Joseph set out last night for his first campout with Scouts last night. The weather has been warm all day. It was snow, rain and sleet about 11:30 and now at 9:00 am it is 43 degrees. I'm sure it was an experience for him. It's an experience for me to parent him as the oldest and one who experiences all of these things for the first time.
Growing up I always had Rachelle to pave the way for me so I could learn from her experiences. It made my life much easier, even though I didn't realize it at the time. Being a parent to my oldest child is often an exasperating experience because he is a boy, the oldest, and because we are so very different personality wise. I am super OCD about getting homework done correctly and in on time, and he is not much of a worrier about it. I am super outgoing and for the most part he would like to blend into the woodwork. He enjoys hanging out and watching TV, playing video games and shooting basketball while I think/feel we should use every moment to clean, work on a skill or do something I deem "productive." My relaxation skills were directly inherited from both of my parents!
He is not wrong all the time and I am not right all the time, but it definitely is a balancing act. I think I don't do the best job balancing most of the time, but we are learning. Its hard to know how much to push him to achieve or to let him figure out on his own. I try not to make him into who I think he should be, but I want him to be successful and responsible. It's hard to know what is teaching and what is forcing him...when to show love and when to teach and show tough love. But we keep trying to balance his emerging independence and the necessary things that he needs to be held accountable for as he grows up. I will keep trying to balance as best as I can and I think we are doing okay...At least I think I am and the fact that he didn't want a ride to the campout with a friend yesterday...he wanted ME to drop him off gives me hope that he still likes me a little bit.
Report on the campout to come!
Oh Liisa, welcome to the years of a preteen boy. We have many of the same battles/issues. Sometimes I wonder how I ever thought that I would actually survive parenting 4 boys! Lol. Luckily, I think we will survive. We will just have more gray hairs!
ReplyDeleteMiss you!